Dear Sedaratives,
When did sweet-potato fries become all the rage? Are they really better than normal french fries?

Brian
Los Angeles, Calif.

Dear Brian,
Whoa, whoa, whoa. I wouldn’t go crazy and call anything better than anything else. Especially when it comes to fries. French fries have been around for as long as I can remember, which is roughly about twenty-eight years, or the beginning of time. I think sweet-potato fries, at the current juncture, are merely making a strong statement of their existence. They are saying, “Yo! I’m made from a different kind of potato and I’m here to stay! You can snack on me however you want; any which way!” (It’s a known fact that all sweet potatoes have the cadence, flair, and in-yo-face politeness of early-’80s rappers.) Let me elaborate: sweet-potato fries are like the Choco Tacos of fries, and regular fries are like actual tacos. You don’t want Choco Tacos all the time in place of regular tacos; it’s too much choco. If you don’t get my reference then you must not have had a childhood or you are from space.

Steven

Dear Sedaratives,

Trout seem to be the most untrustworthy of fish. Do you think that’s because of all of this “catch and release” bullshit in the fly-fishing industry? They’re just used to getting their way, so they can act any way they please?

Swanhuyser
Tuscaloosa, Ala.

Dear H.,

I’m not sure what an “untrustworthy trout” is, so I just Google Image–searched “untrustworthy trout.” One of the pictures that came up was of a very gorgeous Jessica Biel wearing a leopard-print scarf. This confused me. So I searched further and noticed another picture, which was of a small blond boy making out with a pig through a fence. (My safe search was off.) This leads me to believe only one thing: your question is some sort of mail prank. You are, in fact, probably referring to some sort of depraved sex act involving, in no particular order: Jessica Biel, metal fencing, a large potbellied pig, and a tiny adult. My keen sense is also justified by the other pictures in the Google search, which include but are not limited to: a mug filled with bacon, an old-timey milk jug, and an enormous pack of Old Gold cigarettes with effeminate legs coming out of the bottom. Disgusting. I refuse to answer this question. Go rinse out your filthy brain with peppermint soap.

Steven

Dear Sedaratives,

I’m having my third wedding. (I’ve been married four times before, but this is only the third wedding.) What are your thoughts on whether I can get away with wearing the same dress I wore at...