Mammal: The Koala

The koala sleeps all day, waking from a series of naps to munch on eucalyptus leaves. Aboriginal Australians thought the koala was drunk because of the way it rocks on the tree branch, reclining way back and gulping for air. Today many say that the koala is permanently stoned.

In fact the koala has a bad diet of only eucalyptus leaves—poisonous to most animals and low in nutrition— and sleeps to conserve energy, appearing drowsy because of a slow metabolism. Koala is the aboriginal word for “no drink” because the eucalyptus trees provide sufficient hydration for the wooly animal.

Koalas live in eastern Australia; to spot them in the wild, one can go to Magnetic Island off the coast of Queensland. When passing another hiker on the Forts trail (the best koala-spotting hike), the etiquette is to offer a suggestion of where a koala can be found and hope the other hiker will reciprocate.

You may be hiking on the Forts trail and one member of a group of English girls in bikini tops will advise: “Down trail number nine there’s a koala. It’s gorgeous.”

And down trail number nine, nestled in a canopy of green with the sun catching its gray fur, you may find a sleeping koala. It will hold on to the branch with a long hind leg, its arm hanging down, its fingers splayed. The face appears dignified with a dominant black nose, soft pink chin and ears that point out like a teddy bear.

When it wakes to scratch itself with those impossibly long black nails, the koala languidly moves while the wind combs through the eucalyptus branches.

Then the koala down trail number nine pushes back, turns around and climbs up the branch—paw over paw. The little grey marsupial grabs out and pulls back a branch full of leaves. It nibbles and sucks at the eucalyptus— perched with its round butt on the thin white branch.

The seemingly gentle koala makes fearsome grunts and growls to communicate and is actually a pretty vicious animal. A rescue team had to be sent to an island where koalas overbred and were ripping each other apart with those grasping black claws.

Koala sex also looks pretty kinky in a violent kind of way. The reclusive koala mates in the evening with other members of its colony (a group of koalas whose home ranges fit together like a puzzle). The dominant male will prowl his area during the breeding season, fighting with the other males and impregnating the females.

After conception, the baby koala (known as a joey) emerges in thirty-five days and looks like a pink tail climbing up its mother’s soft white belly. The joey navigates to the mother’s nipple and the safety of her pouch. The pouch makes the koala a marsupial (like the kangaroo) and not a bear.

As the joey grows, the mother sleeps in a circular embrace with her baby, making humming and grunting sounds. The mother feeds with the joey...